The Beginning...

If 2020 has taught me anything, is that you really can't foresee the future.

This year has has had a series of career let downs for me; any fashion graduate will know the importance of the 'final show', the endless rounds of being chosen to then finally being cancelled due to Covid19. Exposure, gone.

A business deal, which I can only describe as an Artist being signed by a record company, has been in the process for 9 months. Meetings, trips around the world, weeks/months of work sending designs - ultimately leading to me being dropped last minute.

Furthermore a similar issue with a rather important freelancing job which ceased to exist the day of which, I was to sign the lease to my apartment needed for the job.

So, I'm pretty confident in saying this year was a fail...

But was it? Anyone who knows me as a designer, knows I lean towards certain melancholic themes, for reasons I'm not quite know. I don't want to look at the start of my graduate life as a fail.

The business deal was never a good fit. Terrible. In fact, awful! I was signing over a lot of my rights, I no longer would be able to pursuit Haute Couture and my wishes to pursuit environmental benefits against fast fashion. Looking back, why did I ever want to do this? Sadly, I know the answer, I was/am terrified of what the future holds. I come from a normal, working class background, I'm repeatedly questioned/doubted upon because no one in my background understands, nor sees this as a viable career. Which for the 1st time in my life, this unthinkable thought has suddenly been thought, and has scared me.

But, the continuous fails has brought a light to my body of gasoline and my ambition and sheer determination to independently achieve has been relit. So here I am...

Finishing this website, ready to post on the 01/01/21. Ready to try, try, try again.

I'm sure we can all look back at 2020 and feel sorrowful for the events/careers/people we have lost, but as humans we must continue, strive to be better individuals; and to quote one of my favourite books, of a character I idolise, "Tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther. . . . And then one fine morning—So we beat on, boats against the current". (The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald).

Until next time...

Zak